Alone and I'm in Between
by phoenixdown7
Summary: [SasuNaruSasu] Of course, in waking life, Naruto would realize that life was not a fairy tale and the good guy didn’t always win, but somewhere deep inside him, he’d believe in something better.


Author: Phoenixdown7

Disclaimer: I do not, nor will I ever, own Naruto.

Alone and I'm in Between

He leapt silently across roofs and telephone poles, marking the lone figure on the ground with his steady gaze. The air was cold and crisp and he could just barely feel snowflakes fall and melt against his skin.

The figure below wavered a bit under a heavy load, but he never lost speed, his lonely tracks melding into the snow covered street. They turned three corners before the figure stopped in front of a brightly lit house, smoke issuing from its small chimney and billowing out into the cloudy night.

The figure paused before touching the door, and turned a bit to look up directly at his pursuer, but he was blind in the darkness of the night and the pursuer waited patiently – eyeing the ways in which the figure had grown and the contrast of blue with gold.

The gaze inexorably slid away and the figure shook his head.

The pursuer watched as the door opened slowly and warm yellow light bled out across the blue snow, washing across the figure and his baggage. It took only a few seconds for the figure to enter the house and close the door behind him, depriving the snow of warm light and his presence completely.

Upon his rooftop perch, the pursuer waited.

……………………………………………………………………………………………..

Naruto licked his chapped lips as the door opened slowly and he stepped over the threshold, his black Konoha-issue snow boots scuffing against the hardwood floor before he did an awkward twist while holding a stack of haphazardly wrapped presents and stepped out of them. He breathed a sigh of relief as Sakura spotted him and came rushing to his aid, deftly weaving through the crowded living room as she herself balanced a cookie tray in her right hand.

Naruto waved lopsidedly which tilted the entire stack of gifts and nearly sent the top one flying before Sakura could catch it deftly with her free hand and scold him with her mouth.

"You're late, Naruto!" She complained, looking as though she'd cuff him in the head if she wasn't already so weighed down by other things. "I was just about to set Kakashi's dogs after you!"

Naruto just smiled at her as he stepped past her, knowing that instead of being angry at him she was just worried. Naruto held the rest of the presents precariously in his arms. Sakura's wary gaze switched from Naruto to the stack, apparently trying to decide whether she should help him or hurt him.

"Sorry, Sakura-chaaaan!" Naruto chirped in his most sing-song voice, secretly delighting in irritating the girl in much the same way he had when they were mere prepubescent ninja-in-training. "Where d'ya want all of these?"

Sakura just rolled her emerald eyes and sighed, blowing at the pink bangs that were blocking her vision, before leading him through the crowd of familiar faces.

Everyone was chatting in groups, holding wine glasses and small plates of hor' douvres. Naruto caught a giant whiff of eggnog and cookies the moment he entered and it only got stronger as he traversed toward the tree at the other end of the room.

"Hey, Neji!"

Neji barely nodded to him, his face expressionless, as Naruto jostled passed him and Ten Ten, who was taking a delicate sip out of her glass of chardonnay. Chouji and Ino weren't far along and Naruto nodded to them enthusiastically, sending the stack of gift boxes on a dangerous trajectory toward the floor before he could correct for the angle and keep one tiny box at the top from falling on top of Ino's wine glass. Both looked a little soused already, so they didn't seem to mind. Actually, Ino seemed to enjoy the new place she had found against Chouji's side, already pink faced and giggling at nothing in particular as Naruto pushed passed them.

Naruto had to do a little dance when Akamaru, who was no longer a small dog, dashed between his legs – and he could barely avoid Kiba who invariably followed, stinking of eggnog and alcohol. Just as Kiba was about to barrel into him, he suddenly showed a great deal of mobility control for someone so obviously drunk by slowing down and draping a heavy arm around Naruto's shoulders instead.

By this time, an oblivious Sakura had already slipped away through the crowd and Naruto was left alone with his presents and Kiba practically drooling on his shoulder.

"Hey, Kiba!" Naruto greeted Jovially, trying to hold back a laugh at Kiba's glazed and slightly confused stare. "The night has just begun, and you're finished already?"

"Naruto! Yerr here!" Kiba slurred, having completely missed Naruto's words, and Naruto winced as the canine-lover's alcoholic breath washed across his face. "Akamaru was jus' tellin' me tha' you were here, an' I didn' believe him, 'coz I couldn't smell ya, bu' now I can." Kiba took a long dramatic sniff of Naruto's collar. "Yepppp, no one else can smell so much like a mangy forest animal."

Naruto rolled his eyes and batted at his inebriated friend lightly, narrowly keeping the stack upright as Kiba fell backwards like a leaf in the wind and hit the carpeted floor soundly.

"Ah, Kiba-kun!" From out of nowhere Hinata emerged from the crowd and crouched beside Kiba, who was now snoring soundly away.

"Kiba-kun really shouldn't be allowed to drink so much eggnog," Hinata muttered, looking a little worried.

"Ah, don't worry, Hinata," Naruto added helpfully. "I'm sure he does this all the time."

Hinata sighed, her long black hair cascading down the front of her shoulders, and pulled Kiba off of the floor with surprising grace for one who possessed such a small form. She looked up at Naruto and smiled shyly, Kiba hanging limply at her side. "I'm glad you finally made it, Naruto-kun. I'm sorry I can't talk to you longer, but…"

"Yeah, you'd better get him to a couch," Naruto supplied, _or a bathroom_, he thought as Hinata dragged Kiba away, noticing that the dog-boy already looked a little green.

Naruto shook his head and finally stepped out of the fray to stand before a massive tree. Sakura was arranging more presents beneath it, crouching over in a beautifully tailored forest green dress that reached the floor except for two slits that tenaciously revealed most of her outer thighs on either side. Naruto had to gulp as she stood back up to look at him, because no matter how many years had passed since his childhood crush on her, she would always be the most beautiful girl in Konoha.

She must have noticed the heat that was splotching across his cheeks because she looked away prematurely, her cheeks dusted slightly pink.

Naruto cleared his throat and he would have put a hand to the back of his head in embarrassment had his hands not been so full. "Is this where you want them?"

"Ah…yes," Sakura shook her head as though to completely right herself and pulled the top two presents off of his hands. "Just put them anywhere beneath the tree." 

Naruto nodded and bent over, placing the gifts beneath the tree right in front. He could feel Sakura's eyes on him, but when he stood up and looked back at her, she was looking away with an occupied expression on her face.

"You've got a lot of people here," Naruto observed as his eyes scanned the packed living room. When she had invited him to this Christmas party, he hadn't expected it to be full of so many guests he didn't know.

"Yeah, well that's what happens when Ino becomes the head of party planning," Sakura replied with a slightly offended affectation. "I'm not positive, but I think she's invited half of Konoha."

Naruto laughed, realizing that it was probably true. "Looks like it."

"I don't know how I'll deal with this," Sakura admitted, running a hand through her carefully done hair. "It's not even 8 o'clock and half the guests are already drunk."

"Ah, don't worry, Sakura-chan." He placed a good-natured hand on her bare shoulder, looking down at her with his usual disarming smile. "I've seen you deal with worse."

Sakura smiled and looked up at him, her eyes taking on a different hue in the blinking lights of the Christmas tree. She was staring at him a bit strangely as the silence built between them, but Naruto couldn't read her expression at all. It looked like she wanted to tell him something but was holding back, which worried him because she never held anything back and if she did it must have been very serious – like she had some sort of terminal illness that would kill her within the month and the doctor had just told her that it was incredibly contagious and that she had to tell everyone she has ever had contact with, but in doing so she would be telling them that they only had days to live and they would all have to be buried in the same spot in order to keep others from getting infected!

Clearly, Naruto's imagination had run away with him, which was only pulled back kicking and screaming when Sakura opened her mouth to speak.

"Naruto, I…" she began, but then stopped, placing her hand on his new black jacket and idly tracing the zipper line with her fingers, before she looked back up at him. "You look very handsome tonight."

Just then Rock Lee burst onto the scene, bumping into Shikamaru who was predictably lounging on the couch next to Temari as he contemplated the blinking lights on the tree.

"Sakura-chan, my love!" Rock Lee exclaimed merrily and grabbed her hands in his. He was wearing fake reindeer antlers atop his head and his usual tight green leotard, which was spruced up with a red ribbon sash tied around his slim waist. In short, he looked like an overgrown Christmas tree ornament. "'Tis the season for youthful merriment and romance! Won't you stand beneath the mistletoe with me and show our love to the world?"

"Ah, no, thank you, Lee," Sakura replied a bit frantically, glancing back at Naruto apologetically before pushing herself away from Lee's enthusiastic grasp as gently as she could. "I think I have to check on the cookies. It smells like they're burning."

And with that she was gone, leaving a noticeably wilted Rock Lee in her wake. But that didn't last long, before Rock Lee pounced on Naruto and whined.

"Ah, Naruto-kun! How do you do it?" Rock Lee wailed, his eyebrows wiggling fiercely in his alternately excited and dejected state.

Naruto, who was too busy being mesmerized by Rock Lee's formidable eyebrows took a while to register the question. "Eh? What're you talking about, thick-brows?"

"How do you get her to watch you with those adoring emerald eyes that shine like jade?" Lee pleaded with a note in his voice ranging on hysteria. "Please teach me your formidable techniques!"

"Techniques?" Naruto laughed a bit self-effacingly, beginning to feel thoroughly confused now. After all, he had never seen Sakura 'watch him adoringly' in all his life. In fact, he couldn't name anyone who had done that to him before, not even _him_. He probably didn't even know what that type of expression looked like as it had never been clearly directed at him – not even from a mother's gaze.

He would like to blame this sudden wave of insanity on Rock Lee's part as drunkenness, but Rock Lee stayed away from alcohol like the plague ever since the disastrous finding that he was a natural master of the drunken fist.

Luckily, he was saved from answering the wide-eyed, thick-browed ninja by Ino's slurred announcement from the middle of the room.

"Lissen here everrbody!" Ino had stood up on a table, paying very little heed to the shortness of her pale blue dress as she sloshed back another gulp of what looked to be sherry. Chouji, not too sober himself, was attempting to hold her upright by unknowingly placing one of his large hands on her butt, which she didn't seem to notice in the least. Shikamaru just placed a hand over his eyes and shook his head, while Temari looked on with mild disapproval. Various others were chuckling throughout the room, including Naruto, but no one thought to stop Ino from giving her very important speech.

"This Chrissmass party needs a little game…and I know juss the right one!" Ino smiled triumphantly, before pulling out a sprig of mistletoe from god-knows-where and waving it about. "All you have to do is take this in your hands and apply your chak…hiccup …kura to it like this!"

Ino placed her other hand over the mistletoe and pumped some of her purple chakra into it, when she lifted her hand the mistletoe glowed a slight yellow. Everyone in the room stared at it thoughtfully, wondering what it meant.

Ino just smiled haughtily as though this was all her brilliant design (which it most likely was) and held the plant up so that more people could see it. "Whoever has the color of chakra that shows itself in the mistletoe after you apply your own will have to kiss you!"

The rest of the room was filled with murmurs and giggles now as people realized what type of game this was supposed to be.

"So, who in this room has yellow chakra?" Ino asked, holding a smirk on her flushed face as she surveyed the crowd.

For a long moment, no one in the crowd moved, until one man Naruto had never seen before stepped up to Ino slowly. With that, Ino giggled and the crowd held its breath as she leaned down and kissed him messily on the lips.

The man stepped away looking dazed and the rest of the crowd erupted into laughter and hoots, various men slapping the man on the back as he returned to his angry looking girlfriend.

Naruto spotted Sakura entering the living room from the kitchen after that, watching the new festivities with some mildly wary puzzlement. She made it through the crowd as Ino passed on the sprig to another willing participant, and finally stopped beside Naruto.

"What did Ino start this time?" She asked, watching guardedly as a particularly soused looking man cupped the dreaded mistletoe in his hands and tried his best to concentrate.

As Naruto explained the rules of the game, Sakura's expression could only get darker, but there was a suspicious pink tinge to her cheeks as she glanced back up at Naruto, which a small part of him that wasn't completely oblivious to the inner workings of the female mind chose to ignore. Arguably that portion could be said to belong to the Fox, which inevitably had a taste for more dangerous prey. Prey that it could already feel at the periphery of its senses.

"Oi, Sakura! Catch!"

Sakura's attention was caught just in time and she reacted swiftly, in true kunoichi fashion, to catch the offending sprig which was unceremoniously lobbed at her by her best friend and eternal rival at the other side of the room.

Ino smiled daringly as the entire room switched its attention to Sakura, some men looking entirely too excited about this change in events, but none as excited as Rock Lee who was practically bouncing off of the walls in anticipation.

"Go on, Sakura-chaaan!" Ino egged on. "Who will the lucky man be?"

Sakura, who now looked like a deer caught in the headlights but still had her fighting spirit intact when it came to challenging her rival, slowly nodded and clutched the mistletoe tighter as though it would run away from her at any moment. Naruto watched on in curiosity, feeling a little protective of her as all the men in the room surveyed her like a piece of tasty meat. She seemed oblivious to this, however, as she carefully fed her own pink chakra into the tiny plant that she kept cupped in her hands. The whole room seemed to lose its breath before she slowly revealed the mistletoe and it's now deep burgundy hue.

There was a collective groan as all the men realized that that wasn't their chakra's color at all. But the ones who knew and had served with Naruto all turned their expectant attention to him, including Sakura who was now looking up at him apologetically, but determinedly.

Anyone who understood Naruto's growing relationship with the fox would realize right off that he was the only man in Konoha, possibly the world, who could possess such an exotic and dangerous chakra color- just like the hue of dried blood. As the case was, however, only Ino, Chouji, Neji, Ten Ten, Shikamaru, Hinata and a recently revived Kiba knew to gaze at him; each with varying degrees of amusement on their faces.

Naruto gulped, but smiled nervously, before he looked down Sakura who had already moved unnervingly close to him in the small space of seconds. Naruto suddenly wished he was knackered as the entire room seemed to close in on him. It's not like he wasn't used to being the center of attention; no, he'd had plenty of getting used to that – good and bad. He'd just never really…well…

It's not like he was a complete virgin to these things. He had Kakashi and Jiraiya as teachers, after all – a perfect double hitter for all things perverted. It's just that…in all of his life he had only ever kissed one person, and that was by accident.

As a 12 year old, he would have been delighted to take this chance to show Sakura-chan his sexual prowess, but now, at 17, he was old enough to know that he'd never really had any. In the past few years that really counted for that kind of thing, when normal boys would be 'making it' with all the girls, he had been struggling to become as powerful as he possibly could in order to save a comrade who didn't want saving. Sakura, too, hadn't been excluded from this type of rigorous life as she promised to help Naruto take their comrade back. After all, she had been in love with him, and in the years that followed their disastrous fight at the Valley of the End, Naruto had realized the very same thing about himself.

He was in love with his best friend, something he had once thought was just an unhealthy obsession was now undeniably understood as something deeper; something that cut right into his heart in a way that his best friend never could with only his fists. Sasuke had become nearly everything to him and it took his prolonged absence for Naruto to realize it. In these circumstances, Naruto grew up, and in these circumstances, Naruto missed out on all that could be considered sexual or romantic. He had never kissed anyone in all those years, except Sasuke.

Naruto gulped again, but moved his hands to Sakura's shoulders as people giggled about the room. He couldn't back out of this now, and besides, it's not like Sakura wasn't beautiful and he didn't harbor some tender feelings for her. She was everything a man could want, if he didn't already want someone else.

Sakura smiled encouragingly and slipped her hands onto his chest. She looked nervous, but sure in her purpose. Naruto nodded to her awkwardly, before he finally leant down and pecked her on the lips – or that's what would have happened if Sakura hadn't moved her hands around his head and held him there, deepening the kiss.

Naruto let out a surprised gasp and nearly toppled over when Sakura pulled him down further and the whole room seemed to have erupted in howls and hoots. Naruto's brain could barely register a slight flare of some familiar chakra from behind him before Sakura suddenly pulled away, breathless.

"Now _that _was a kiss!" Kiba hooted from the crowd still looking a little more than buzzed.

"Yes," Neji added knowingly, sipping his sherry delicately. "You could almost say she had meant to choose him."

Sakura blushed profusely at that, but she didn't say anything.

Naruto, taking her silence as profound embarrassment and scorn at the accusation, chuckled heartily and replied, "Nah, you guys! We're just friends! That was _nothing_."

The room suddenly went very still and Sakura and her enormous amount of chakra stiffened noticeably. Naruto had just enough time to realize that he might've said something wrong, before she punched him hard across the face, sending him crashing into the Christmas tree. He regained his dancing vision soon enough to see the tail-end of her harried escape through the crowd, which was full of people shaking their heads.

Naruto got up slowly, picking shards of ball ornaments out of his arms and other unmentionable places and dusting himself off. He was completely confused as people in the crowd started murmuring and shaking their heads.

"So troublesome," Shikamaru sighed tiredly from his perch at the couch, Temari only nodded, frowning at Naruto and muttering something about the density of men's brains.

"I think that's enough for tonight," Ino declared, jumping off of the table with Chouji's help.

"What did I say wrong?" Naruto asked no one in particular.

But Ino answered for him, looking considerably sobered up as she stepped close to him. "Everything."

"Oh," Naruto replied lamely, still feeling entirely in the dark about the whole thing, but realizing that he would sound like a complete dumbass by continuing with his questions when it seemed to be so obvious to everyone else.

All the guests went back to chatting in groups, forgetting about the mistletoe game altogether.

Ino surveyed him for a moment, in that intuitive way that only women could affect, before she turned around and waved at him dismissively. "You'd better lay low until she feels better, Naruto, for her sake…and yours." Then she paused and turned back to look at him. "Maybe you should take a little stroll, ne?"

Naruto frowned, but nodded. It was generally hard for him to know why he got in trouble when he did, but it was as clear as crystal when people didn't want him around. With that she slipped upstairs toward Sakura's room where they would have girl-talk and maybe a good long cry about the evils of Naruto and maybe men in general. Naruto shook his head and sighed, mumbling a merry Christmas to Shikamaru as he passed him and avoiding everyone else's ambiguous looks, except for Rock Lee was looking murderous and had to be held back by both Neji and Ten Ten as Naruto passed.

The front door closed behind him to reveal a blue-tinted world covered in snow. Once again his surroundings smelled like dry ice instead of the sweet aroma of eggnog and gingerbread. He zipped up his orange coat and sighed, vaguely noticing his breath as it misted in the cold still air of winter. His boots crackled in the fresh snow as he made his way toward his apartment, but he thought better of it when he remembered a beautiful spot by lake he liked to go to when he had been kicked out of someone's party or get together or gala event. Really, it happened too often – although it didn't usually involve making one of his best and most treasured friends cry.

Naruto pondered his actions that led up to Sakura's abrupt hit to his jaw as he walked deeper and deeper into the snow-laden forest. He couldn't understand it. Sakura had looked so uncomfortable with the crowd's jeers. In fact, he had never seen her become so silent. So why would she get so mad with him after he tried to settle things by explaining the truth of the matter, unless…

_No, that couldn't be it_, Naruto thought, shaking his head vigorously. _But she was really enthusiastic with that kiss; almost a little too enthusiastic for it to be purely platonic, _a voice at the back of his mind cut in wisely. Naruto stopped in his tracks, which happened to bring him right to the edge of the shimmering lake.

Oh no… 

Naruto was so busy pondering the error of his ways and his extreme denseness when it came to anything social that he neglected to notice the familiar and slightly dangerous chakra signature that stopped right beside him.

"Do you love her?"

"Ack!" Naruto nearly jumped out of his skin at the deep monotonous voice that sounded right beside his ear and his eyes went wide as he turned his head and took in the shimmering form of his once best friend. "Sasuke?"

Sasuke only watched him expressionlessly, his black eyes reflecting some of the moonlight from the lake and his black bangs swaying slightly in the crisp breeze that rustled through the trees. His skin was almost translucent in comparison with his hair and his clothes, which were all black.

Naruto instantly bristled, a million things going through his mind at once; like how he would take Sasuke down and drag him back to Konoha right now, how he had absolutely no weapons on his person except for a bottle-opener (always be prepared), how beautiful Sasuke looked in the moonlight, and how ludicrous it seemed that after so many years Sasuke would just show up at a time and place like this and ask him…ask him…

"What?"

Sasuke didn't even blink, his voice absolutely the same as though he was lip sincing a tape recorder. "Do you love her?"

"What…why…?" Naruto babbled, wondering why years' worth of relationship issues had to pop up all in one night. It was too much, especially with Sasuke. Everything was always too much with Sasuke.

"It's a simple question, Naruto," Sasuke replied, inching closer until Naruto vaguely realized that the dark boy had him flat against a tree trunk. "Do you or do you not love Sakura?"

Naruto started to bristle at Sasuke's patronizing tone, something that had been hardwired into him ever since they were 12 year old rivals. His voice took on a curious edge to it that he never used with anyone else. "Why do you want to know, bastard?"

Sasuke remained silent, staring at Naruto before looking away toward the lake, before he finally mumbled, "You kissed her."

Naruto frowned, studying Sasuke's facial expression, which was almost a pout to anyone who was trained to see it. The gears in Naruto's mind began clicking into place as he surveyed Sasuke critically. He wouldn't make the mistake of writing off people's emotions simply because he couldn't believe them to be true. That's what got him into that mess with Sakura, after all – and neglecting all of his other faults, Naruto learned fast.

"I didn't kiss her," Naruto began slowly, watching Sasuke's minute reactions to his words. "It was more like she kissed me."

Sasuke pulled his eyes from the lake and gave him a hard stare as though to verify Naruto's words. Naruto could tell Sasuke was slightly satisfied when his pout vanished and he went back to gazing at Naruto intently.

"But," Naruto began, a small vulpine smirk growing on his face. "What were you doing watching me, eh?"

Naruto felt a small thrill when a small blush blossomed upon Sasuke's once pale cheeks, much to the stoic boy's annoyance. Naruto smiled, but his heart was racing a mile a minute – something that never happened when he was near Sakura. He felt a mixture of anxious and bold, weak and powerful at the same time; and it scared him and excited him. Sasuke was a complete enigma, but at one time, Naruto thought he could understand him, and they could understand each other. Naruto thought things were easier back then, but really he had been hiding behind the rivalry in order to keep his inner feelings at bay. The feelings were dangerous because they were new, but over the years he had learned to accept them as a somewhat heartbreaking necessity. After all, Sasuke was lost to him, and it could only take force to bring him back…and then there was a very small chance that their relationship could grow much; especially since Sasuke could never feel for him in the same way. But here Sasuke was, in the dead of a snowy winter night, and he looked jealous and a bit sad.

"Do you want to kiss me?" Naruto meant to say this loudly, but his voice broke half-way through to show his nervousness in the other's presence and he cursed himself inwardly.

Sasuke's face was very close, and he looked to be frowning to an invisible inner struggle, but Naruto had to take a chance; much like Sakura had. It probably wouldn't work and he might even be forced to run off into the night, cursing Sasuke and men in general; much like Sakura. But he would take the chance, because both he and Sakura knew that feelings like these couldn't be ignored. At least not until you've exhausted every resource. And Naruto was never one for giving up what he wanted.

Naruto closed the distance, pulling Sasuke closer by the back of the head, threading his tan fingers through raven black locks that gave and brushed against his skin. Sasuke gave a jolt of surprise, but his lips mashed against Naruto's awkwardly, before Naruto let up on the pressure and allowed Sasuke to find his own way. Sasuke paused but recovered quickly and brushed his chapped lips tentatively against Naruto's, sliding his own pale fingers along the fabric of Naruto's jacket and up his sides.

Naruto let out a surprise gasp, when Sasuke's teeth closed over his lower lip in a light nip and Sasuke took that opportunity to slide his tongue along Naruto's teeth up to the roof of his mouth.

Naruto's heart beat faster and he registered every touch of Sasuke's warm fingers through the relatively thin fabric of his coat and shirt. His own hands found the lip of Sasuke's shirt, beneath his black winter shawl, and slid them upwards. Sasuke gasped abruptly and mumbled, 'cold', against Naruto's lips. But Naruto continued to move his fingers upwards until they slid against a pair of pointed nubs, which made Sasuke stiffen and moan.

Sasuke released Naruto's lips and they both panted harshly, sending they're misty breath into the air between them, before Naruto licked Sasuke's jaw – something no doubt, he picked up intuitively from the fox.

Sasuke let out a shuddering breath.

"That was…" Naruto spoke breathlessly, between random licks and nibbles along Sasuke's skin. "Good."

Sasuke pulled back abruptly, a frown marring his face as he attempted to reign in his erratic breathing. His eyes darted all around. He looked like he was about to flee.

Naruto frowned, unwilling to acknowledge that pain he felt that Sasuke would leave him again. "I'm not letting you leave; not after that."

Sasuke stopped fidgeting and focused on Naruto. Naruto almost shivered as Sasuke's black eyes traced his body from his head to his toes and back up.

"You look beautiful." Sasuke remarked, turning his gaze slightly away as he frowned. Naruto had never seen him look so conflicted, but the words warmed him deep inside nonetheless. He didn't really know if he believed him, but he wanted to. Even though it made him sound like a woman, he knew what Sasuke meant because, looking at Sasuke, he thought the same thing. He had always thought that, except, before it used to be a point of envy, not longing.

"I shouldn't have…" Sasuke began, but then closed his mouth. "I can't…"

"Why not?" Naruto challenged, stepping forward slightly and frowning challengingly.

"You know why," Sasuke answered coldly, fixing Naruto with a patronizing stare.

"You don't have to do it alone!" Naruto yelled, years of frustration bubbling out as his voice echoed around the surrounding forest. "And you don't have to throw your life away for that snake-bastard!"

"You don't understand." Sasuke shot back, looking like he wasn't just arguing with Naruto anymore. "Itachi is too strong."

"I'm strong too, and I can make you stronger and you know it!" Naruto grabbed Sasuke's shoulders and shook him violently. "Let me fight him with you!"

"No."

"Why not?!" Naruto growled. "We've already taken down most of Akatsuki, Itachi is on the run, and I have become more powerful than before! Together, we can defeat him, but if you stay with Orochimaru he will only use you to become immortal, regardless of what happens to Itachi!"

Sasuke just shook his head abstinently, his straight black bangs partially shielding his eyes.

Naruto just stared up at his impassive face in growing frustration. "I don't understand you. If we work together, I know we can win."

"Life isn't a fairytale, Naruto." Sasuke murmured methodically. "And the good guy doesn't always win. Itachi exterminated the entire Uchiha clan – the strongest clan in Konoha when he was only a teenager. You can't beat him. You can only hope to survive long enough to kill him."

Naruto thought over Sasuke's words and his frown grew. "So that's why you wanted to give your body away, because you don't believe you'll live either way?"

Sasuke remained silent.

"I never thought the great Uchiha Sasuke was so weak," Naruto spat.

"Not weak, practical," Sasuke replied, looking nonplussed by Naruto's jab. "If you fight him, even with me, even with Kakashi and Sakura, and every one of your comrades, you will die." Sasuke paused. "I wouldn't be able to live with that."

Naruto felt unexpectedly pleased by Sasuke's concern, but that was trumped by his pride as a shinobi. "Then I die, but at least we'll die together with dignity and honor; not as puppets to a sick megalomaniac who wants to live forever. Maybe you've forgotten, but a shinobi is never afraid of death."

"But you used to be," Sasuke cut in with a frown. "If your constant screaming and flailing during missions was any indication, you used to be afraid of a lot of things."

Naruto growled at Sasuke's verbal blow, but he chose to ignore it. "I was 12 back then, and in case you haven't noticed I'm older now… and I didn't flail."

"I have noticed," Sasuke murmured after a moment of surveying Naruto's entire frame once again.

Naruto fought the blush that was already heating his cheeks as Sasuke's gaze went south. He never knew Sasuke could turn out to be such a pervert and it was both exhilarating and creepy. "Yeah, well…you're not getting any more of _this_ unless you come back to Konoha."

Sasuke pouted again and Naruto had to admit it looked really well placed on Sasuke's lips, if not a little disturbing. And Naruto felt ridiculous bantering with Sasuke about sex after so many years of _not talking_ or having _any physical contact_ whatsoever, especially at a time like this that he was attempted to proclaim this entire night a hallucination caused by a few too many eggnogs and bad milk.

However, all thoughts of hallucinations were dashed away as Sasuke moved quickly and took Naruto's lips for a second time. Naruto fought against it out of principle for a little bit, before Sasuke used that debilitating lip nibbling technique and Naruto lost all motivation to do anything but enjoy the ride.

Finally, Sasuke pulled back and smirked as Naruto breathed harshly through his open swollen lips. Naruto tried to frown, but it was really hard when Sasuke was looking at him in much the way Sakura had earlier in the night, except this time Naruto knew what it meant and he could reciprocate the feelings. Although it was all very frustrating and Naruto already knew he was losing something important.

Sasuke pulled Naruto closer then and whispered in his ear, his hot breath tickling the hairs along the back of his head. "Merry Christmas, Naruto."

And then, before Naruto could react, Sasuke was gone. A puff of smoke his only trace. Naruto fell to the ground on wobbly legs and felt as though he would both laugh and cry at the same time. He was happy and devastated all at once and it made him feel slightly bi-polar as he stumbled to his feet and looked out across the half-frozen lake.

He stood there for a long time, maybe hours, maybe minutes until the cold seeped through his boots and he made his way back through the forest before his feet snapped off.

The streets were quiet, but pockmarked with the tracks of people who had left Sakura's party, and Naruto decided that tomorrow he would go visit Sakura and try to explain everything to the best of his ability without making her cry again. He really didn't want her to hate him, especially now that he felt so peculiarly alone.

When he got back to his apartment, he slowly changed into his pyjamas and put on his age-old penguin hate before climbing into bed.

That night, he dreamed of a world in which the Uchiha clan had not been wiped out and Sasuke had grown up a happy and well adjusted ninja, his brother showing him the ropes of life and carrying him on his back until Sasuke was just too big. A world in which Naruto had parents and the Kyuubi was nonexistent, and no one had reason to hate him. And in that world, Naruto and Sasuke would find each other again and then maybe they would be free to pound each other in the dirt, declare each other hated rivals, and later, realize their feelings for each other and live with each other happily ever after. Of course, in waking life, Naruto would realize that life was not a fairy tale and the good guy didn't always win, but somewhere deep inside him, he'd believe in something better.

And in that way, he will save Sasuke.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………….

AN: Uh…..yeaaahhhh. This one-shot really grew into a monster and I really don't know if it had much of a point. Sort of a reflective piece or a character study that examines the changing world and relationships of our favorite shinobi of Team 7. I've actually grown quite partial to SakuNaru since the time jump, so that may have shown itself a bit here. But I had to reign that in for my ultimate and tested love of SasuNaru, which I still think has its merits…and I hope you can still see those in this one-shot.

So yeah, thanks for reading!


End file.
